Lonely Delirium
by LostinOblivion
Summary: Postep for Kids in the Hall.


There is something about the heat that screams of freedom and possibility, that makes you believe that day, that moment, will last forever. It's something with the perspiration on your body, the smell of the air, or maybe it's just that it doesn't get dark until late in the evening. It just does something to your head, it makes you believe in things that you never would have before. It teases and tempts you into doing and trying things that cooler weather would have you scoffing at. It screws with your head until reality is far away.

Or at least that is what Emily Lehman was telling herself as she tossed around her bed for the umpteenth time, trying to get comfortable and ignore her broken air conditioning. She was blaming the California heat for everything these days. For being late to work this morning because she couldn't tame her hair (humidity is a bitch), for using every excuse not to go home (California with no AC, are you kidding?), and for falling in love with her partner. The heat messed with her mind, let her think that having sex with him was actually a good idea. What's more it was really the reason she went slightly weak in the knees the first time he kissed her (it was hot, she was feeling faint).

Of course, she knew she was lying to herself, making excuses, so she wouldn't feel as stupid for taking that chance and perhaps ruining a very good partnership. Really, if she'd still be on the East Coast, no way would she ever have gotten into bed with her partner, even if he was as good-looking as Matt. Hotness was not an excuse for breaking the rules. Though, dear god, it should be, as far as Flannery was concerned.

If she hadn't had the bright idea of shacking up with her partner, she probably would have been able to fall asleep right then. As it were, her thoughts, as they had been the last two weeks, were occupied by wondering about the last several months, their break (up?) of two weeks ago, and the rapid disintegration of their partnership.

"Damn it Matt!" She shouted into her empty, smoldering bedroom.

Didn't he realize what he was asking, when he asked her to trust him? Emily Lehman didn't genuinely trust anybody, not since she was very young. How could she have ever learned to trust anybody when every last one of them hurt her?

She'd told him she loved him, and that was one the hardest, most wonderful things she'd ever done. Every time she looked into his eyes and pressed her lips to his, she tried to show him that. Didn't he understand how much he meant to her?

But, how could he when she told him she was choosing the job over him? What else could she have expected after saying that, than the heartbreaking look in his eyes. She knew she hurt him then, but she didn't know what to do about it.

She was being a negotiator that's it. Disagreeing with him on how to proceed, they'd done it before, and they'd undoubtedly do it again. How could it have led to this, this empty, lonely, friggin sweltering bed? It was never this hot when she was with Matt. That was a completely irrational thought, but they created their own heat, so outside sources were barely a blip on their radar.

But, he was in the wrong too. He'd cut her off, hadn't really bothered to listen to her, or given her suggestions any credence, and not for the first time either. Sure she agreed that it was too early to storm the kid, and she didn't like the senator either, but he never gave her a chance to say anything about it. How could he really have expected her to walk off and just quit with him?

"Shit, shit, shit…" Emily mumbled into her pillow, not surprised at the lack of sleep she was destined to get that night.

* * *

Matt's AC worked, but he didn't notice, and didn't care. He thought they had something. She told him she loved him, something he hadn't entirely expected to hear, and that had to mean something. The way she told him, he knew it was a big deal for her, that she had to mask it as a secret. Truth be told, Matt didn't let those three tiny words slip from his lips easily either. Emily was the first in a long time, and not a damn thing in this universe or the next would make Matt him regret saying them. 

But, didn't she realize how much that hurt? She hadn't even blinked in her decision not to follow him, just did it. She told him she was with him, but ended up not being with him at all. And then, she'd made it pretty clear she'd choose the job over him, and that, that really cut deep. Matt wasn't too mancho or insecure enough to admit there had been tears on the drive home. Okay, so maybe he was only secure enough to admit it to the dust bunnies in his apartment. Still, he could admit it to himself. Just like he could admit that it hurt like hell to think she hadn't really meant those three little words. But, he'd been so sure she did! He could feel it when they made love; it was different than their first few months had been together. She put all of herself into it, and held nothing back.

She'd whispered those words again that night. When he was inside her, her breath kissed his neck, and his ears barely caught those words. That had been a night for the books. Not only because she'd finally said it, and not only because they made love three times (who says sex all night was only for twentysomethings and teenagers?), but because for the first time in his life, Matt Flannery had a particular thought. It was after the second time that night, that he held her in his arms, her heart beating against his, that he realized he might one day like to put a ring on her finger.

Of course, that wasn't going to happen now. But, he still couldn't bring himself to believe that she hadn't meant what she said, even if she did pick the job over him. She was protecting herself, being rational, she was being Emily.

He had shot her down earlier in the evening, had that upset her that much? It hadn't entirely been intentional, but he knew there was a certain way to approach those kids. How had one negotiation led to this? Maybe, it was something-

"Get out of my head, Em!" He hollered at the air, stopping himself before he began analyzing.

That woman had wound herself into and all the way through him. She was in his head, and under his skin; just imagining her sent a rush of heat to his- it was excited heat. He hadn't been lying when he told her that he pictured her naked when she was spouting her psych speak.

And this didn't just conveniently stop now that they weren't together anymore. Emily had diagnosed and HT three days ago, and Matt had drifted off, watching her, picturing evey naked curve of her body as she spoke. He was pretty sure he was pink after Cheryl shouted his name to snap him out of it. Of course, that was the least of the problems they were having now, in their post break (up?) partnership.

God! What was he going to do with himself?

* * *

Emily made a decision upon waking up. This wasn't working, this being apart thing they were trying on for size. And, there was only one thing to do about it. 

"Matt, can I talk to you for a minute?" She asked him, as she arrived at their cubicle for the morning, dropping her bag.

He looked surprised, probably because they hadn't had a private conversation in two weeks. "Uh, yeah, sure."

"Great, thanks." She bit her lip, and led the way to interrogation 2. Anybody with a person to question would bring them into Interrogation 1; they'd have privacy.

"So, what's on your mind?"

"I've been thinking, and I think I figured something out."

"Oh yeah?" Anyway that could how to fix their broken relationship, he wondered half wistfully, half sarcastically.

"I don't want to be your partner," she blurted, catching him off-guard.

"W-what?"

"I don't want to be your partner anymore, Matt. We're so good together, but that's not what I want anymore." She took a breath, steeling herself.

"Okay, so what do you want?" He was trying not to sound hurt; did she want to go back to Phoenix?

"I'd rather be your lover. I'd rather be your girlfriend. I want to be the person you go home with at night, I want to be the one curled around you in bed, I want to be _with_ you."

His mouth opened slightly, but any words he might have uttered were caught in his throat.

She went again, "partners, lovers, companions, we can't be everything to each other Matt, and I don't want to try to anymore. I picked what's more important to me, and it's worth losing you as a partner."

His mouth closed, but didn't open again, and he stayed rooted to his spot in the floor. He was too honestly flabbergasted to comment; out of everything Emily could have needed to say to him, that wasn't what he was expecting, dreaming of maybe, but not expecting.

Emily began to get nervous; had he moved on already, or just gotten over her that quick? If so, she would be saying goodbye to their partnership anyway; unrequited love is not something you can work around.

Sensing her unease, Matt finally got his senses back, and reached forward, grabbing her, and pulling her toward him, planting his lips on hers. She kissed back hungrily, desperately, with everything she had inside her. One hand snaked around his waist and up the bottom of his shirt, the other dug it's way into his thick hair. One of his hands caressed her hip, threatening to dive below her waistband, the other was on the side of her face and neck, holding her close.

"Think we should christen this room?" He mumbled against her mouth.

She giggled, "didn't we already to that once?"

"No that was Int. 1 remember? We had to shut the cameras off."

"Right, not a bad idea…does that door lock?" The tail end of her words were practically lost in another passionate kiss.

"In here- oh god, guys, come on!" Cheryl admonished them, while trying to push back a curious man in cuffs, no doubt someone to interrogate.

They broke apart quickly, a scarlet flush tracing up both their faces.

"My office, ten minutes!" She demanded, shutting the door. They could hear her shout something that sounded like three.

"That was embarrassing," Emily mumbled, though she was more amused than embarrassed.

"Not the first time Cheryl got an eyeful," Matt answered, sweeping her toward him again, and capturing her lips.

"Maatttt, Cheryl's office remember?" She half-attempted to push him away.

"Yeah, meanwhile, we still have ten minutes." He grinned teasingly.

They both jumped at a knock on the two-way glass. Once again growing scarlet, the two hurried out of the room, hearing the distinctive sound of Frank's laughter.

Ignoring it, they beelined for Cheryl's office, hurrying in, and sitting in front of their not so amused boss.

"What happened to I won't see it in the office?"

"We figured you'd bring any suspects or witnesses into 1, everybody uses 1." Matt offered his smart-ass excuse.

"The cameras aren't working, haven't been for almost three weeks." She noticed the two suddenly blush. Judging by the way Emily was staring at her shoes, that was their doing.

"Oh." Matt took an interest in his hands. Yeah, it was them.

"Is that really your excuse?"

"Uh, we were kind of just figuring that if we were partners anymore it wouldn't matter." Matt offered.

"But you are, in fact I thought you two broke up two weeks ago?"

"Yeah, well, that wasn't really working for us," Emily explained.

"So…what? Are you back together, or are you just taking sex breaks in the interrogation rooms?"

"We're back together," Matt answered quickly, and then grinned. "But you know Cheryl, sex breaks aren't a bad idea."

"Keep dreaming Matt."

"Worth a shot," he shrugged. "Oh, we want to request new partners."

"Took you long enough!" She scolded them.

Neither knew what to say, as they watch her fish around in a file cabinet.

"I swear for two such smart people, you're really quite dense." She shook her head at them, handing them forms.

"So…you've been expecting this?" Emily asked skeptically.

"After these past two weeks, half the office was praying for it. Not that I'm not incredibly disappointed to lose my best team of negotiators, but at least it's worth it."

"Thanks." Emily smiled as she handed back the sheet, it's few lines already filled in. Matt turned in his seconds later, already grabbing for her hand.

"Just one thing. Even you if aren't partners, you still need to keep your pants on in the office."

* * *

_Posted this first on the Fox message boards, and realized I never posted it here. Thanks for reading and reviewing!_


End file.
